Rekindle the Santa Dream

Be a Santa everyday!!!#UnwrapChristmas

It only takes a spark to get the fire going.
And soon all those around can warm up in its glowing.
That’s how it is with God’s love,
Once you have experienced it
You want to sing
You feel like spring

You want to pass it on…

A few of us gathered together for Secret Santa tidings, divided by names and united through a common Christmas spirit of sharing. And it is in this spirit that we bring this blog chain to you.

I am thankful to Kala Ravi for passing on the baton of spreading Christmas joy and spirit.

It is here through words and my secret santee that I unwrap Christmas on my blog for you.

Christmas is not a festival... it is a feeling. Oh yes..another cliche ..so what ??? the truth must be told!!!

It is a feeling that lights you up,
That brings cheer to the face,
That ushers in new beginnings
That invokes the child in you
That also nudges the Santa inside
That makes you want to give
That makes you want to want
That resets the clock 
That sets the ball rolling
to bring in another year
And more than anything 
it is the feeling of faith
a belief that there is a Santa somewhere
who knows what you need
and when you open you eyes in the morning
your wish would be granted.

Don't we all want to believe in Santa. 

But somehow I feel that kids of today are embracing realities too soon than they should. They know so much that they feel so less. 

The other day I was speaking to a friend at work, and he was talking about how her eight year daughter daughter is growing up fast. This time when she was asked to make a wishlist, she matter- of-factly told her father that she knows there is nothing like Santa ... that she has always known that it is Mumma Papa who keep the gifts near the pillow when she is sleeping. So this time she has decided to directly tell her parents that she needs an "i-pad" for this Christmas.

I think it is time we need to redefine the meaning of Christmas for our kids.

I would rather urge all the parents out there to celebrate this Christmas with their kids with a difference. Instead of pampering your kid with more gifts, give him the gift of giving. Ask him to be the Santa for someone who is still living the dream of Santa. Someone who looks at that Christmas tree and the make believe gifts and wishes that he could get just one of them.

Make them visit an orphanage -- Let them know the joy of bringing smiles. 
Join a cause and make your kid a part of it.

Rekindle the Santa dream for your kid this Christmas. Make this Christmas meaningful.

One way of doing this is by giving children a home by supporting Divya Disha.  Corinne Rodrigues passionately works towards this cause and will be more than happy to share more information.

I now invite Shalini Nair to spread the message of Christmas and New years on her blog.







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Be a Santa everyday!!!#UnwrapChristmas

It only takes a spark to get the fire going.
And soon all those around can warm up in its glowing.
That’s how it is with God’s love,
Once you have experienced it
You want to sing
You feel like spring

You want to pass it on…

A few of us gathered together for Secret Santa tidings, divided by names and united through a common Christmas spirit of sharing. And it is in this spirit that we bring this blog chain to you.

I am thankful to Richa for passing on the baton of spreading Christmas joy and spirit.

It is here through words and my secret santee that I unwrap Christmas on my blog for you.

Christmas rings so many jingling bells for each of us. No matter how old we may look to the world outside, this is one day the child in us no matter how deep the corner of our hearts we have shoved it in, comes out running with red cheeks and sparkling eyes. Christmas is not an event or a date, it is a feeling. As they say save the best for the last, no wonder this comes just before we end the year.


Like everyone else, ever since my earliest memory I have also always waited for Christmas every year. I remember at school while all my friends always used to get excited by the idea of getting gifts from the Santa, somehow for me more than meeting Santa, being Santa was THE THING. I still remember the cheer and love Santa would get when he would throw up chocolates and cookies for us. And it used to fill up my heart thinking "Wow... what a lovely job he has!!!"

Over the years, I have realized that I love being Santa Claus more than being on the "receiving end" The idea of giving a thoughtful gift that can bring a smile on someones face is much more gratifying and humbling. And as they say, it is always the idea and the thought more than the tangible gift that makes people happy. Till now had always been sending gifts to the people I know, but this time thanks to Richa @ Corinne, for the first time I got a chance to send love to a stranger whom I have never met or known. And let me tell you it was super fun. And we all must try it sometime.


So on this Christmas, let me break some myths of giving gifts:

1. You need an event or a reason to send or give gifts

2. Gifts are for families and friend you have always known and loved

3. Gifts are tangible



The new rules are as follows:

1. Be a Santa everyday - You don't need a calendar for giving gifts

2. Send love to people unknown. A very lovely way of doing this is by sending postcards to people around the world. Use postcrossing for this.

3. Everything counts -Next time try a post-it, a letter or just a smile. That has just the same impact


Just spread happiness and smiles for no reason but happiness. And you will see much more comes back to you.

I now invite Kala to spread the message of Christmas and new years on her blog.

MERRY CHRISTMAS LOVELY PEOPLE!!!!


ps - Sometimes if you cant find  anyone to shower your love, do it for yourself. Have a look at how I pampered myself this Christmas!!!

Float - Haiku

captured on a random afternoon

old and new

life floats on green

seasons change

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What took you so long

I met love
In its full glory it shined from a distance
It lured me by its looks
But my fingers craved for the touch and feel
Of this endearing "must meet once in life" being

And so i went near it
Tried to wave at it and greet with a smile
I knew I had met him earlier somewhere
Seen it at close quarters
But something had changed

Yes those eyes
Those eyes are not  as clear as they used to be
Their innocence has evaporated in the dunes of time
They are not as dreamy
Realism has taken over

Love that was and love that is
Is it the same person I met twice
Or they are just look alikes
What separates one from another
They are so similar but yet so different

The first time I met love
It was so light on its feet
Always floating and bloating like a balloon
The hot air balloon that sweeped me off the ground
and took me along in its fairy tale world

But the new love is so grounded
Has put on some weight, well at the right places though...
those unkempt hair are now subtle and grey
and those eyes talk more than they speak
and those hands they are much more stronger to hold me tight 
and never let me go

And as I sit and wonder
Trying to make one from the another
A thought crosses my mind
Is it the love that has changed
Or the way I look at it

With the years left behind
and the moments lived and relished
one evolves and gets more real
and while trying to do that
the idea of love also changes

The love I met today
may not blind me with its bright light
but will still light me up
with happy thoughts and warm feelings
and keep me cozy every day

And all the while I was in my thoughts
love came and stood next to me
looked in my eyes 
looked through me
and said ..."What took you so long?"


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Feeling Blocked

Off late we all have been talking a lot about Writer's Block ...or in the blogosphere the better name for it would be Blogger's Block. Specially in the blog community that I am a part of, this word has been doing usual rounds recently. People seem to be catching it like flu. Honestly, I always shy away from using this word as a reason for my infrequent writing. To get into a Bloggers Block, I need to first reach the first symptom of this disease. The first symptom being a regular blogger.

But yes I do get into these blogging swings, and have always wondered the "why" of that phase and also struggled on the "How" of getting out of it. And finally the simple answer came from a chit chat session of two "no-nonsense" ladies of the squad - Corrine and Vidya. The truth stared right in my face when I read that conversation. I agree it is nothing but laziness that keeps us from writing. Yes, the slumber can come due to very many reasons, but to break the vacuum, we need to fight with the God of Slumber. 

(Do read the conversation here..its kind of fun to read) Click Here

So the conversation became a prompt for all the bloggers to write about their "tried and tested" tips around how to fight the Bloggers Block. So here are my nascently cultured pearls of wisdom:

Enjoy the Break - While you are at it..Enjoy it !! I feel the more we think about the block, the more the idea of getting back to writing gets distant and tougher. So I feel one must not think too hard or try too much. Writing should come naturally, because that is when it gets the best of you. If you do not have thoughts or opinions you particularly want to talk about ..so be it. Enjoy the silence till it lasts :)

Blog Surf - Something what always keeps me connected to blogging and the want to come back to it is reading what others bloggers have to say. I generally try not to lose touch with blog surfing and reading. Many times the muse to get back to it lies in some thoughts or posts that just connect to you and you get a feel.."Well ..this should have been my post"

Write for yourself - Do it for yourself. Many times bloggers may get into this self inflicted pressure of being the best every time. The fear for being judged for your thoughts can sometimes gets so heavy that you start rejecting all that you write thinking it doesn't make the cut for being published. While one thought is not to be so harsh on yourself the other is that sometimes writing just for your own self is also fun. I remember Corrine giving me this example once. She said that just like when a pen doesn't work we keep on writing on a rough paper till it gets the flow back...the same thing holds good for writing. And I could'nt agree more with her. So my fellow friends going through a block, do it on a rough page just for your eyes. Soon you will get the flow back.

Save a Date - This works for me. Sometime a self commitment is the biggest motivator. Like last time I had set a date for myself when I will get back on the blog. And from the time I committed to the day I had committed for, all the time in between my mental state auto corrected its lethargy, lack of ideas and inability to put the pen on paper and made me meet my commitment on schedule.

Sorry, but I cant think of a fifth tip. Actually so much has already been written about this and I trust more or less the thought that always works for all is the want to get back. If you love your writing you will always find your way back. And in the meantime, do not sulk. Fill up that time space with more reading, more contemplating and more feeling and observations.

So these were the thoughts of an amateur on the cure for a disease which I suffer a lot. For more ground realities and workable solutions please visit the Write Tribe entries on this prompt.

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Home an abode of Hope

It does feel like home, doesn’t it?

Radha got up early that day. It was a big day for her, and the excitement had stolen her want to sleep. The whole night she had been twisting and turning, checking the bag and the admission card now and then.

She kept looking at the passport size photograph of Gopi in that card and kept feeling proud and nervous at the same time.

She dressed up Gopi for her first day to school. This was her lifetime dream. The make shift home in the pipe, which had no furniture which qualified it as a house but all the hope, dreams and love that made it a home. It does feel like home, doesn’t it?

This was written for the 100 words on Saturday on Write Tribe. Well this time I could not manage in exactly 100 words but thats OK!!! .You will still love me the same, won't you??



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Silence Breaker

And it has been months ...Months I have not given my blog any time and attention.

Why???

Well those are unnecessary details. What is important is that from here, where do I take it forward. Do I get back to being me, expressing in words, talking to all my readers, putting my thoughts to paper or I let it fizzle?

The question haunted me for quite some time .. an inner voice kept telling me that I wont be able to do justice to writing for some time now, an inertia had cropped up in the days gone by, the words and thoughts that were doing rounds inside me were not the ones I wanted to write and make  permanent.. So I took a break, with a date in mind when I will get back to writing.

And the day is today. I have no prepared post, no agenda in mind. Just one conviction that I shall write. And so here I am talking to my long lost friends hoping that I will connect. (Well I do not even know how many of you I have actually lost forever..but I am sure I will lure you back :D)

Last few months were my "me time" months which I spent talking to myself, calibrating my life force, shifting gears of life and refuel it with new love and hope. I got to see a little more of the country I have been staying since last 2 years, and I must tell it is breathtakingly beautiful. I promise to end this post with some nice pictures that will give you a slight sneak peak.

So as I was giving myself company, one constant thought hovered around me all the time and kept troubling me. And a recent deep discussion with a close friend around the same thought, helped me clear out the mist around it. I have always believed that we are the makers of our destiny, but every time something not so favorable happened to me, invariably i would end up saying.."Well that was destined to be that way, could not have helped." and then the vicious cycle of those not-worth-answering questions like "Why me???" "Where did I go wrong" "Why luck is never on my side" started.

But why ask question when the answer lies within us. No matter what the situation is or where it started, how it will end is completely our wish, our will and our want. My conviction to make it end my way is what will make all the difference. So the power lies within you..the power of want!

And I want to write... I want to express freely .. I want to manifest my life force into words ...and so I write today.

As promised ending the post on some beautiful notes

The pictures are from Bunaken Island and Gili Island in Indonesia.
Signing Off till we see each other again...and this time it will be soon



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Money Money

A big fat Indian Wedding is all about money honey. The more you splurge the more you wish you could.

I am all for traditions and customs, but it hurts me immensely to see loads of money going down the drains for getting a lavish wedding set up. A simple wedding, with some close friends and family, around a sumptuous lunch or dinner would any day make much more sense.

While I also agree that this wedding propoganda actually also supports a whole industry and creates a lot of money making options. But think of a middle class family, who have saved day by day to create a decent bank balance. And here comes a daughter's wedding and the bank balance goes into a depleting spiral.

In North India, the give and take of gifts has also reached an unacceptable limits. All this adds up to the already high budgets needed for planning a wedding.

It is high time that the coming generation starts changing the trend.
















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Lazzatdaar Food

Laazzatdaar khana, sumptuous food has always been the soul of an Inidan wedding.

For each guest that goes to a wedding, the memory of the lip smacking food is that lingers long after everything has been forgotten. And more than the good memories, the bad ones stick for eternity. A wedding which has everything right but somehow falters on the taste buds of the guests, stands little chance to be branded as a successful wedding.

People around the world take their food seriously, but we Indians are a little more touchy about it. Our celebrations and anything around happiness starts and ends with good food. So it is but obvious that when we go for a wedding, this is our top agenda. Drinks and Dance comes a close second, but Food ..well that is the sanctum santorum of the whole wedding piece.

So what do you always keep in mind when arranging for the food arrangements for a wedding.. Well everything. It starts from the menu, to the cook, to the layout, to the variety to the estimate on how much of what to be made, everything has to be thought out and planned ... and after all that planning all you can do is just pray that everything goes as per your plan and people are full of stomachs and praises as they leave the wedding hall.

I may sound like an exaggerator, but I have never been more close to the truth. All I say here is out of sheer experience (good and bad) So I am sure you wont mind a few tips from the expert. Here they go:

1. Do not try too many news. Always go for a caterer or an agency with whom you have had some good experience already. Even if you haven't arranged for a wedding as yet, I am sure you would have attended a few where you were awestruck by the quality of food. Always go on the tried and tested root .. In this case the road less traveled may not be either exciting or rewarding.

2. Always keep a good mix of vegetarian and non vegetarian dishes. 

3. Keep kids in mind when deciding the spread. It is very important for the parents that the kids are busy eating so that they have some peace and can relish their plates

4. Focus on desserts. Keep the best for the last. 

5.  Always label your food, so that people know what they are eating

6. Do not mix too many cuisines, a theme is always better. Eg Gujrati or Punjabi or continental. Many times in our race to give too many options, sometimes the caterer is too hard pressed on time and starts taking shortcuts in preparations and that takes a toll on the taste. The key is keep it simple and tasty.

7. Always keep an option of fresh fruits and milk. Many time there are those oldies who fast. If they feel taken care of..you have won the battle.

7. Gol Gappes are a must if it is a north Indian wedding - or any wedding if you plan to invite me.

And one last thing ...You can never make all your guests happy when it comes to food. The litmus test is you yourself. If you like what you have served...chances are you have done fairly OK on the lazzatdar food front.
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Condition of Dreams

Adi was her first born. He had brought her joy, pride and attainment the moment, the nurse had put him in her lap. That feeling was one its kind, something she had never felt ever before. The love she had for Adi was selfless and unconditional …or so she thought.

She wanted the best for him; she had dreams for him, dreams that overtook her love for him somewhere.

When Adi confessed her love for Rukhsaar, his eyes reflected the undying trust in her mother’s love for him. He knew she would never ever say no.

But so he thought.

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This post is written for the 100 Words on Saturday on Write Tribe. This goes for all those parents who somewhere forgot to draw a line between their dreams and the dreams of their children. Their dreams should not and cannot be a condition for their love. Its true that  mother gives life to his child, but still it is his life. No one owns it ..no one should expect to.

Kanyadaan

Kanyadaan is the most important wedding ritual which is a token that seals the deal. This is the moment when the Brides parents finally give away their daughter to the groom and hope and wish that he and his family will take good care of her. The emotional fool in me sheds a tear every time I witness this ritual. It may be as far a relation as my neighbours friends daughter getting married or as close as my new new sister in law. The finality of this moment and the realisation that the daughter has been handed over to her new life, always gives me shiver down the spine. 


Kanyadaan which has been derived from Kanya (Daughter) + Daan (Donation) is said to be the noblest of all donations. It does take a strong and a giving heart to give away the most priced possession of your life, your daughter, in the hands of a stranger and let her go on her life journey without holding your hands. Since, this is considered to be an auspicious milestone of the parents life, in many regions of India, the parents of the bride fast the whole day of wedding. They only have food after the Kanyadaan is over and they have been relieved of their biggest responsibility in life. 

It definitely is a moment of accomplishment for the parents. The day a girl comes to life, her mother starts dreaming of the day she will be a bride. So what if it gives her a pang of pain thinking that her princess will no longer be only hers, but at the same time the desire to see her happy and settled in her married life is the secret dream of every parent.

In a kanyadaan, once the father of the bride gives the hand of his daughter in the grooms hand, their hands are tied together, or they hold each others hand. This is emblematic of the unison of two hearts and souls forever. The relatives give their blessings to the bride's parents by throwing flower petals, congratulating them for the big moment.

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Steal the Shoe

 

 

J for Juta Churai

 

Of all the fun customs in a wedding, the one which clearly steals the shoe..errrrr I meant steals the show is Juta Churai. Set at just the right time when the wedding ceremony is happening under the "Mandap", this is a perfect filler item to add a little excitement to the otherwise- starting-to get-tiring night full of "Mantras" and serious wedding  rituals.

 

 

Basically for this custom, the siblings of the bride are entrusted with a serious mission of stealing and hiding the shoes of the groom. The groom is caught vulnerable at the opportune time when he has to sit in the mandap barefooted to start the wedding ceremony. Right at that time, his shoes are taken away from him right under his nose. To get those shoes back, which by now, are not just his shoes but his pride as well, he has to beg, threat or bribe his sister in laws.

 

 

The activity pumps up energy even in the friends of the groom, who are trying to guard the shoes or get them back from the not-so easy-to-fool sisters of the bride. In all my Juta Churai memories I have till now, the best is when I had stolen the shoes in my cousin's wedding. It was a fight to the finish, and the groom's cousins and friends left no stone unturned to reclaim those shoes from us. When nothing worked, as a last resort they stole the footwear of all the bride's sisters, as a barter bargain for the groom's shoes. Ofcourse that didn't work either and finally we did manage to get what we wanted from the groom. Our demand was simple .. we did not take money (which usually is the custom) but instead asked our otherwise shy  "Jijaji" (groom) to sing a song in praise of all his sister in laws.

 

Juta Churai is so famous that even Bollywood has banked on its popularity. Have a look at this sing from Ham Aapke Hain Kaun

 

 

I feel this custom would have started in order to bring the two families closer. Over the time, people have started taking this ritual too seriously, and instead of bringing people closer, it ends up in a tussle. But of-course that is only momentary, and later on people do look back at it with fond memories.

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